Smiling with Life

I remembered when Smiling with Life put me in his lap when we gathered around to hear grandfather’s story.  It’s one of my favorite memories.  Grandfather would tell us stories about good versus evil and how good always won and how trickster Gods also had good sides.  While grandfather was telling us stories, grandmother and mother would be cooking a treat.  I remember the smell of honey, a real treat!  Mother would give half to me and half to Smiling with Life.  But Smiling with Life would always give most of his share to me. 

            I also remember father sitting with us, also listening to grandfather’s stories, although father would be tired from his long hunting journeys.  Father would also be the first to fall asleep and mother would put a blanket over him and give him a soft, sweet kiss for good dreams. 

            After grandfather’s stories and eating our treat, it would be time for bed.  Grandmother would put out the fire in our tippi and crawl under the blanket with grandfather and mother would crawl under with father.  As a young child, I had a huge fear of the dark and nightmares. 

“Water Moon,” Smiling with Life would say and I would turn to him and see his big smile, “do not worry.  I will protect you.  I would never let anything happen to you, not as long as I am alive,” he would say as he would touch my cheek.  Then I would hold his hand and I would not let go until I fell asleep.  Safe in my tippi with my family. 

            I woke up to voices of the teachers walking through the room.  Waking up all the girls in my dorm.  I woke up quickly, went to the restroom, got dress, and returned to make my bed.  After making my bed, I had to tie my hair back, but it was very difficult.

“Do you need help?” a girl wispeared to me in a soft voice in our own language.  I nodded and she quickly helped me with my hair before the teachers noticed. 

“Thank you,” I replied in our language. 

            We lined up in a single filed and it was not until we were quiet that the teachers would lead us to the dinning hall.  Once at the dinning hall, we sat at our appropriate seats and folded our hands as the priests taught us. 

“Let us pray,” the priest would say once everyone was sitting at their seats.  Once the prayer was done, we were allowed to eat.  The school gave us portage, bread, and water for breakfast.  Although we ate all our food, it was not enough to fill us.  Many of us would secretly pass our food to the younger students so that they would not cry of hunger.  As we ate we did not exchange a single word.  We were not allowed to talk unless it was in the white man’s language. 

            It was shortly after my sixth winter when the white men came to our village to speak with our leaders.  My father was one of the men who escorted our leaders to the meeting.  During that winter I fell ill with an unknown sickness.  The shaman was able to give me herbs to help me feel more comfortable.  I was ill for many days but I was mostly remembered was Smiling with Life sitting next to me. 

“Rest,” he would tell me and he would tell me stories as I fell asleep with my head on his lap. 

“Brother, you will get sick too,” I said through my coughs but Smiling with Life continued to sit next to me. 

“I will always be by your side.  I promised mother at your birth that I would watch over and protect you and I will not break that promise,” he told me. 

“It hurts,” I would tell him as I coughed into my hands.

“I know, but you will have to be strong,” he said as he held me and I fell asleep. 

            “Elizabeth, please come to the board,” said the teacher.  I got up and walked up to the board and the teacher told me to write a word and I wrote on the board the word ‘you’. 

“Very good Elizabeth,” she said and I returned to my seat.  Then she called on Wolf Fang or Marc.  Marc walked to the board and spelled the word wrong.  The teacher slapped him with her ruler.  But Marc did not cry or yell, he stood tall.  That was one should except from the grandson of the village’s chief. 

            The meeting lasted for a week and then the white men left.  I was glad when they left our village and thought that life would return to normal.  Shortly after they left, my cough and fever went away.  I recovered quickly.  But one night in our tippi, everyone was silent.  No one knew that the next thing my father would say would change everything. 

“The white men want our children to go to school,”

“School?” asked my mother. 

“A place where our children can learn their language and learn to read and write.  They thought it would help our children assimiluate into their society,”

“Where will they build such a place?” asked my grandmother. 

“At their settlements,”

“But that’s so far!  Many children will not survive that long journey!” exclaimed my mother. 

“Which children will go to these schools and when?” asked Smiling with Life. 

“Each family with a child old enough to go to school will leave in three days,” my father said as he looked at me.  My mother put her head in her hands and begun to cry and my grandparents looked gravely into the fire. 

“No!” exclaimed my brother as he held me, “they can’t take her!  I won’t let them.  She belongs here with us,”

“Son, we are not the only family going through this delima.  There are families in our tribe that will lose all their children to the white men.  We will only lose one,” said my father staring at me with sad eyes.  My brother held me tight and shook his head. 

“She’s too young.  Father, let her wait a year,”

“No.  The white men said all children who have surviored five winters.  If we do not let her go, they will take her,”

“Why would our chief do this to us?” asked my mother with tears in her eyes. 

“If he did not, they would bring an army.  They would kill us all, including the children.  It is for their safety.  Even the chief’s own grandson must go with the other children.  We will no longer discuss this.  Moon Water will leave with the other children,” said my father and he got up and left our tipi, but I knew that he was sitting outside, crying and praying. 

“Brother, what’s a school?  Is it close by?” I asked.

“It’s a place where you will go on exciting adventures and you will learn important skills.  Skills that we can not teach you,” he told me.

“Is it close by?”

“No, it’s far away,”

“Will you come with me?” and that was when I saw a tear in Smiling with Life’s eyes.

“No, but I promise you.  There will be other children that you can share your adventures with and play with.  You will keep each other company,” he said with a fake smile. 

“I want you to come,”

“I can’t.  I’m too old for adventures,”

            I sat in my sewing class, sewing a quilt.  The quilt was plain and I wished I could decorate it with some sort of paint.  Add animals on it or symbols from my home.  But I knew that the school would never allow it.  Then something caught my eyes.  I looked out the window and saw white stuff falling from the sky.  It was what they called in the white men’s language, snow. 

            We were allowed to play in the snow outside.  But our jackets did not keep us that warm and we had no toys.  The younger kids enjoyed games of races to keep them busy while the older kids just stood around and tried exchanging words.  The teachers kept a close eye on us because we were not allowed to speak our native language, only the white man’s language.  Then I noticed Wolf Fang standing alone, just watching the younger children play and looking around the whole yard.  Although he was very young and one season younger then me, he tried to take the role of a leader and many of us looked up to him, including myself.  I could tell that he was no longer the boy that would follow his male relatives everywhere and join them in every boring meeting.  Now he was taking his place as a man and our chief at the school.  I could tell that the teachers kept a close eye on him and maybe, even feared him of what he could accomplish among us. 

            Three days passed quickly and the white men brought horses and cattle pulling carts.  At first they were empty but was starting to fill quickly with children.  My clan came out to see me off, especially Smiling with Life. 

“I made this for you,” said my brother.  It was a necklace with a happy face carved into it. 

“It’s to remind you that I will always be there, in your heart,” My brother kissed me on the cheek and gave me a hug.  My clan hugged me and my mother cried as she held me.  As I was about to let go of my mother, my grandfather told me to never forget my people and where I came from.  I promised him that I would never forget my heritage.  Then Smiling with Life took my little hand and gave me one last look until someone grabbed my arm and forced us to let go.  Then I started to cry as the man put me in one of the carts. 

“I don’t want to go!  I don’t want to go!” I yelled with the other children and I was crying.  I remember seeing the chief and his son saying good-bye to Wolf Fang.  And then I felt a jolt and the carts started to move. 

“Protect them!  Watch over them!” yelled the chief and his son to Wolf Fang.

“I promise to protect them!” I heard Wolf Fang yell back.  Then I saw the adults running towards the carts but the carts kept getting faster and faster.  Many of the older adults eventually stopped running, but Smiling with Life kept running with the other young adults. 

“Don’t be afraid, little sister!  I will be with you!  Forever!” yelled Smiling with Life as he stopped running.  Those were the last words I heard him say. 

            Dinner passed by quickly and I returned the girl’s dormitory with my roommates and we washed up and changed into our nightgowns.  When the lights went out and we heard the teachers leave we started to speak quietly. 

“Another winter has come and will eventually passed,” said one of the girls in our language. 

“This winter would be my thirteenth winter,” I told myself.  So many years have passed since I last saw Smiling of Life.  I went to touch my necklace around my neck that he gave me, but I forgot that it was no longer there.  Shortly after we arrived, the teachers took away anything that connected us back to our families and traditions. 

“We will get out of here, Wolf Fang will make sure of it,” another girl said.  I turned in my bed and closed my eyes.  Somehow I knew there was no escaping from the school. 

            The remaining five years of my education passed before my eyes but it was very long.  After my eighteenth winter, I graduated and was allowed to leave with the other older children, including Wolf Fang.  Wolf Fang took whatever was left of us and went back west towards our village.  It was a long journey but eventually we arrived back. 

            Many of us were disappointed in hearing of our clans dying from the white men’s disease and some even moving farther west, including moving onto reservations.  I separated myself from the group once we arrived back, searching for anything left of my clan.  The place where our tipi stood was gone and in placed by another clan.  I continued walking around the tribe, searching for anyone.  By the end of the day I found Wolf Fang who was lucky enough to find his father who was now chief of the village. 

“Did you find anyone?” Wolf Fang asked me.  I shook my head.

“You can stay with my clan, we will give you shelter and food,” but I told him that I would keep looking until night fell.  I was unsuccessful and started to walk back to Wolf Fang’s tipi.  While walking I started to sing my grandfather’s prayer song that he sung to me as a young child and eventually taught me how to sing it.

“Moon Water,” I heard a voice in the wind.  The voice was coming behind me and I turned around and saw him.  He was much older, masculine, but still had that same smile and look in his eyes. 

“Smiling with Life,”   

Fei JiaLing, The Go Prodigy

            I gathered all the small rocks near the stream and brought them home.  I dump half the pile into the white paint and the other into the black paint.  I left them there over night to make sure that the paint settled on the rocks. 

            The next day I grabbed a piece of wood that was thrown out and drew a 19 by 19 grid on it.  Once the grid was made I marked the 4x4 point in each corner, the sides in between the 4x4 points, and the center.  When the board was ready, I turned it over and wrote my name down, Fei JiaLing. 

            The teacher did not notice me in school again.  When I raised my hand he never called on me and when he gave a difficult answer he would always pick me to answer.  The boys in my class were lucky.  The teacher favored all of them and praised them when they did good work. 

            After school I would run back home.  I learned to run home when I was young since the boys would tease me outside the school and on the road to my house. 

            I lived in a small village in China, far away from civilization.  Everyone in the village were farmers and helped one another, but no one helped us.  I lived with just my mother, which was another reason why the boys teased me.  They all had a mom and a dad, while I lived with just my mom and we dependent on each other.  We had our own field to work with but our field did not have good soil and we barley survived each year.  We also lived in a hut that had only one room.   Although it was just the two of us, we loved living our simple lives together. 

            Once when mom sent me into the market, I saw two men playing a board game that I never saw before.  It was on a 19 by 19 grid with black and white stones.  One man was playing black and the other white.  I saw that each player could only make one move and the point of the game was to get as much territory as possible.

“What is this game called?” I asked but they ignored me.  I asked again and one of the men slapped me across the face and told me to mind my own business.  Instead of crying or walking away I stood there and watched.  The men ignored me but I watched them play through three games. 

            That was when I was determined to get my own set.  It took me a week and a half to find the right piece of wood at the junkyard and two days to find the right rocks.  Once I had the set, I knew I was ready to go, but I did not know the rules.

            I returned to the market when my mom sent me to do errands.  I again found the same pair of men playing the game.  I stood there and watched and again they ignored me.  

“Do you play Wei Qi?” asked an elder woman. 

“What’s wei qu?” I asked.

“That is the game my husband and his friend are playing.  He tried to teach me but I could not understand it.  Do you play?”

“No, I just want to watch,”

            For three months I watched the men play and I learned that there were shapes that were good and shapes that were bad.  I learned that sometimes there were certain sequences that both players followed and I saw how one group could be killed. 

“Can I play?” I asked with fear in my voice.  The men looked at me with angry faces and then went back to their game.  I watched in silence until I saw one of the men make a mistake.

“That’s not right, if you go here then black can’t cut you and you’ll have influence in the middle, let me show you,” and I did not waste anytime.  I played out to them what would had be the best result for the player.  Both men looked at me in surprise. 

            One day I came home from school and there were five people in my hut.  My mom told me they wanted to play a game of Wei Qi with me and told me to get my set.  When I came back they were all surprise to see my Wei Qi set, that I made. 

“This man is one of our best players, can you play him?” asked a very old man and I told him that I would be glad to play their best player.

            Our game lasted for two hours and their best player bowed down to me and said, “I lost,” meaning that he gave up because he knew that he could not beat me.  I bowed down to him and put my set away.  The group of people allowed me to go outside to the field to do my chores while they talked to my mom.

            I finished my chores early and when I returned home the people were still there and my mom started to pack some things. 

“Are we going on a trip?” I asked my mom with a big smile on.

“No,”

“Then where are you going?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” That was when I knew that something was going to change.

“Where am I going?”

“The people who came today saw a great gift in you.  They want to take you to their Wei Qi school in Beijing.  Listen my daughter, this school will help you get better and you’ll bring pride to this village,”

“I don’t want to leave,”

“You do not have a choice.  You leave tonight.  I love you, Xiao Fei,”

“I love you too, mom”.

6 Months Later

            I sat at the board waiting for my opponent to show up.  I was surprised that my opponent traveled all the way from Canada to take the professional exam in China.  But like all my opponents before him, he lost.  His lost was a guarantee for me that I would become a professional Chinese Wei Qi player. 

“Congratulations Fei JiaLing,” said the director of the Wei Qi Association. 

“Thank you, sir.  I will make my country proud,”

“Your first tournament will be in Japan and we will like you to stay there for a few years and show Japan that China is not far behind,”

            The Association would not allow my mom to travel with me, however I sent her money so that she could buy food instead of growing it.  Although she has told me that she still enjoys working in the fields and that the village built a house for her to live in.  The villagers started respecting her because of me. 

            Once I landed in Japan my instructor and I headed for the rented room in Tokyo.  I was told that I would be here for at least three years. 

1 Year

            In Japan I had gone undefeated in their tournaments and after a whole year I could speak fluent Japanese.  My instructor and I had to change from one apartment to another since many Japanese are upset with me, being a prodigy from China. 

            In Japan they call the game Go or Igo and in China my rank had been changed to 7 dan professional.  Due to my improvements and tournaments I had gained a large sum of money and I have sent it back to my mother.  By this time, the Japan Go Association had decided to pay for my stay and pay for me to teach their insei students, the children who are trying to become professional Go players. 

“Fei JiaLing, how about going to the Go Congress in New Jersey next year?”

“What’s New Jersey?”

“It’s a state in the United States in America.  Many of the insei will go there and so will some Chinese Go players.  Would you like to Go and try playing in an American tournament?”

            Besides studying Go, that whole year I started learning English to help prepare myself for America.  Just like how quickly I learned Japanese, I also learned English at a rapid rate, especially during the professional Go exam in Japan, since they attract many Western players.

            When I arrived in the US, many people started asking me questions and taking pictures with me.  I shared my story with them and how Go change my life.  I was once a poor village girl that no one cared about and then overnight I became a Go prodigy. 

            On the last day of the Go Congress, the Wei Qi Association had two surprises for me.  One was that I was granted the rank of 9 dan professional and the second was that my mother flew all the way from China to America to see me giving out awards to the winners at the Congress that year.  When I saw my mother I gave her a huge hugged and she said, “We are all so proud of you, Xiao Fei,”

Caleb

                 I lost count of how many trucks we road, how long we walked, and how much distance we covered.  Once we climbed over the fence and it started to disappear in the distance, that was when my mother hugged me and cried.

“Mama, what’s wrong?” I asked her.

“We made it to the free country,”

            We woke up hearing the honk of a truck outside our apartment.  My mother quickly got me up and dressed me in the best clothing we had, even though it was mostly rags.  She combed my hair, disappointed that she did not get a chance to cut it. 

“Come mijio, we’ll have to work today,”

            When we got outside we saw other people gathered in front of the truck.  Most spoke only Spanish but a few learned a few English phrases.  I was standing next to my mother, unsure of what to do. 

            The white men on the trucks look into the crowd and only grabbed a few people to pull into the back of the truck. 

“Where are they going, mama?”

“Work,” she said.  That was when one of the men saw me. 

“You,” he said and grabbed my arm.  My mother kissed me on the cheek and told me to be good. 

            When the truck was filled, the white men were ready to go.  I was disappointed that they did not pick my mother. 

“Mama!” I yelled at her and she gave me a huge grin.

“Don’t worry mijio, you’ll be home for dinner!” she yelled back as the truck started to leave.  I sat there for a long time, not saying a word.

            The truck stopped behind a building where cars were parked and people were waiting.  I saw more white people come up and talk to the white men who took the others and me.  I was confused with all the talking and stood still until someone grabbed my arm.  It was a woman who was dress in a clean and lovely light blue dress with wavy blonde hair and bright blue eyes.  She said something to the men that I did not understand and gave them some money.  She took me to her car and gave me a nice smile.  I asked her where we were going and what I would do but she did not speak Spanish and ignored me. 

            We arrived at a big white house that surrounded by a gate.  The front of the house had a big yard and bushes everywhere with two trees.  The woman drove the car into the garage and then we got out.  I thought that in a house like this I would be doing a lot of cleaning.  But I was wrong. 

“Billy!” she yelled as we enter the house and down the white marble stairs came a boy about my age.  He was dressed in fine clothing, very short blonde hair, and bright blue eyes like his mother.  The two exchanged and words and then he started to talk to me but I did not understand a word he said. 

“Caleb,” said the woman and I looked at her.  She pointed to me and said the word again, “Caleb,” and I shook my head and told her that my name was Angel Mario and then she slapped me.  I was in shock and held my burning cheek.  I stared into her blue eyes that no longer look nice.

“Caleb,”

            I went outside with the boy name Billy.  I was very upset about my red cheek but I knew that I would be home in time for dinner and that I was not stuck at the big white house.  When I saw Billy starting to play soccer and passing the ball to me I was very happy.  The soccer ball reminded me of how I used to play soccer with the other boys in Mexico but we did not have a green field or goals like in Billy’s backyard.  I started to show Billy some tricks and he tried to copy me.  By the end of our play outside Billy learned two tricks that I taught him. 

            When we went into the house, one of the servants gave Billy a sandwich and he went to sit at the dinning room table.  I sat down next to him not knowing what to do and that was when I felt a huge tug at my arm and nails digging in.  I looked up to see Billy’s mom.  She took me out of my seat and into the kitchen to a corner with a stole.  Then the servant gave me cereal that was only half filled and a glass of water.  I watched Billy eat his sandwich with a can coke and I then I looked down at my sandwich, wishing that I could have a taste of an American coke. 

            After lunch Billy and I played in his room.  His room was huge with posters of baseball players and video game characters such as Mario, Sonic, and more.  Billy loved playing video games with me but I think it was because I did not know how to use a video game.  He also had a lot of action figures of marvel characters as well as pokemon.  Then a servant came to get us for dinner and I knew better this time to not sit at the table. 

            When the family was done eating I went up to Billy’s mother and tried to explain to her that I had to get home to my mother.  She smiled and patted my head.  That was when I knew that she did not know any Spanish.  I tried walking out the door but Billy’s father caught me and gave me a whipping for trying to leave.  I did not understand why I was still in this big white house. 

            When it was time for Billy to go to sleep, his mother took me into the basement where a bed was set up.  I realized that I was going to sleep here and in the corner I found a bucket and some clothes that were better then the ones I had from Mexico but were not as nice as Billy’s family. 

“Good night, Caleb,” she said as she closed the door.  I heard a lock and I knew that I was not going to leave.  It was dark with only a small light and no windows.  I took off my clothes and crawled under the blanket.  I said the Our Father and Hail Mary and prayed that I would see my mother again. 

            The next day I took a peek out the window to see Billy get onto a bright yellow bus.  While he was gone, one of the servants watched me the whole day.  She gave me a bath, cut my hair, and started to teach me a few things in English.  By the end of the week I could say, “hello,” “my name is Caleb,” “good night,” and “family”, but I really wanted to see my mother. 

            When Billy went on the bus I was often left in the basement unless it was a bath day and I was not allowed out until Billy came home.  One day I was allowed out and then I had to go back into the basement, when I looked to see Billy I saw him sitting at the dinning table doing work.  I was wondering what kind of kid worked; I never had to work in my life, not even for school. 

            I begun to lost track of how long I was living in the white house.  I discovered that I was there to be Billy’s playmate, but only if he wanted to play with me.  If he had a friend over, I was locked in my room.  For meals the only thing I could have was cereal with water.  A few times I tried sneaking food but if I were caught I would get slapped by Billy’s mother or whipped by his father.  My hair used to be long, but Billy’s mom like it short like her son’s hair.  I missed my long black hair and I started to miss Mexico and my mother.  I was wondering if this was what my mother was thinking when we came to this country.  Her wondering where I am every night and me being locked up in a house for days, weeks, months, and then a year.

            After living with Billy for a year my English became better and in his new grade Billy started to learn some Spanish.  He was able to say hello to me, ask my name, and where I was from.  When I told him my name was Angel Mario, he punch and kicked me.

“Your name is Caleb,” he told me in my language and I replied, “no” and that was when he got his parents who gave me a good beating and left me in the basement for two days.  That was when my spirit was broken and I decided that my official name was Caleb. 

            After living with Billy and his family for a year and a half we got a visit from a stranger.  It was during a bath day and I was upstairs with the servant as I was putting my clothes back on.  Billy’s mother answer the door and the servant looked worried.  She walked out and closed the door on me, leaving me in the room by myself.  Then the door opened and a woman I never saw stood before me. 

            She was young, like my mother, with dark skin, black hair and bright brown eyes.  She had a nice purple shirt on and black pants.  She started talking to me but I remained quiet and then Billy’s mom spoke to her with a stern voice.  I did not understand their conversation but they both looked mad. 

            The woman stayed until a man in uniform came into the house.  The man was wearing a bright badge on the right side of his chest and his uniform was dark blue.  I wore a belt that had held a gun and handcuffs.  I got very frighten until he started to speak in Spanish.

“Hello, my name is Thomas.  I am a police officer and I am here to ask you a few questions.  What is your name?” I was quiet, afraid to answer.

“You do not have to be afraid,” he said and I rolled up my sleeve to show him my scars from the whipping.

“Where did you get those scars?” he asked and I looked towards Billy’s mom. 

“Can you come with me?” he asked.  I took his hand and he took me into a separate room with the lady in the purple shirt.

“Now, what’s your name, I’m not going to let anyone hurt you, you’re safe,”

“Caleb,” I told him without thinking.  After so long I almost forgot my name.

“Caleb?” he asked and I shook my head.  He seemed confused.

“Angel Mario.  She kept calling me Caleb,”

“Who?”

“Billy’s mom,”

“Who’s Billy?”

“The kid who lives here,”

“Is he your cousin?”

“No,”

“How old are you?”

“Ten, I think,”

“You think?”

“I’ve been in this house for almost two years,”

“Two year, you must know the house pretty well.  Can you show me where you slept?” and I took the officer and the lady to the basement where my room was.  The lady went to talk to Billy’s mom and the officer kept me with him. 

“Angel Mario, how would you like to come with me?  I’ll take you away from here,”

“I want to see my mama,” I told him and for the first time, I walked out the door. 

            I told Thomas everything that happened to me.  From the moment my mother told me we were going to leave Mexico to when he got me out of the house.  Thomas asked me what my mother’s name was, but I did not remember but I told him what she looked like and where we stayed when we first came to the country.  Thomas took me to our apartment but the people said that my mother went off to work the day after I left and never came back.  No one knew where she went. 

            Thomas was able to get me citizenship in the United States but I was put in an orphanage in the city where Thomas said I would be safe and he always came to visit me every week.  I was happy at the orphanage.  I made real friends and some of them knew Spanish and while living there I learned to read, write, speak English, and math.  The people at the orphanage were good to me and when I was twelve a couple wanted to adopt me because they could not have children.  When I heard there story it reminded me of my own and I wanted to helped them.  They adopted me and I moved in with them and unlike Billy’s parents, they never hurt me and treated me as their son. 

            I had not seen my mother in eleven or ten years when they found her.  I was twenty in college when I got the phone call from Thomas.  I went home to tell my mother and father the good news and they were so happy for me.  By this time I could speak English fluently and changed my name to Carlos. 

            I stood in front of my parent’s house as I watched Thomas’ car pull up into our driveway.  He got out and opened the door at the back seat and I saw my mother.  She was older then I remembered her with some white hairs growing and she was moving a bit slow then I remembered.  When she saw me, tears formed in her eyes.

“Angel Mario!” she exclaimed.

“Mama!” I exclaimed back and ran to her and we both embraced each other.  After so long we finally found each other and we both cried with joy.  

The World We Love

South Africa, 2017

            A young boy name Joseph was playing music with the other children in a very small village.  Joseph at this point was like any other five year old who could see nothing wrong with the world.  Except that he excel in any musical instrument and beat.  But while playing with the other boys an older boy named Ziwa walked up to him. 

            Ziwa was two years older then Joseph and also a close relative to the chief of the village.  Ziwa often bullied Joseph because of Joseph’s status in the village: an orphan.  No one knows who his father is and his mother died shortly after he was born and during the pregnancy, his mother was not married and seen as a disgrace to the village. 

            While Ziwa was bullying Joseph, Joseph did something extraordinary.  He made one of Ziwa’s friend pick up a rock and slam it over and over again on Ziwa’s head until Ziwa laid dead at Joseph’s feet.  When the children realized what happened, they all ran away to tell the village chief.  Joseph stood where he was, staring down at Ziwa’s body with a huge smile on his face. 

China, 2018

            A young girl name Xiao Fei was gathered with the other young girls in her village to take part in a physical exam by the Chinese government.  Xiao Fei and the other girls are ask to jump, run, climb, and other physical activities in the presences of doctors. 

            The doctors were extremely impressed with Xiao Fei and wrote her down as a child prodigy in many areas of sports such as gymnastics, weight lifting, track, swimming, and more. 

            Although Xiao Fei was gifted in these areas and should be proud of herself, her home life was the opposite.  Xiao Fei lived in a one-room hut in her rural village with her mother, who vowed she had never slept with a man and had a virgin birth with Xiao Fei.  However, the village banished her to the out skirts along with the unborn child. 

            When Xiao Fei enters her home you would not be able to tell that the two were mother and child.  Xiao Fei had full control over her young mother.  Her mother was always scared and worried about making mistakes because she knew that if she made a mistake, Xiao Fei would make her pay by making her do something that she would not want to do. 

“I want rice,” said Xiao Fei.

“It’s too early.  Dinner will be ready soon, if you give me five minutes,” said the mother.  Xiao Fei got up and stared at her mother into her eyes.  Her mother stared back and sweat started to pour down her face. 

“You will give me rice,” said Xiao Fei and her mother nodded.  Xiao Fei then sat back down with a smile across her face. 

Germany, 2016

            A young boy name Thore Vespermann was coloring in his room when his maternal grandparents were talking in the other room about him.  They noticed his gift for coloring and painting since he was two but never told anyone.  They were worried about Thore’s safety as a child and if he should be known to the world as a prodigy. 

            Thore stopped what he was doing and was about to walk into the middle of his grandparent’s secret meeting when someone came through the door.  Thore immediately recognized the young girl as his mother.  She was drunk again.

“You bastard,” she said when she saw him. 

“Dear,” said Thore’s grandmother as she ran to the door to stop her uncontrollable daughter. 

“You’re the devil!  I should had killed you when you were born!  You ruined my life!”

“Call the police!” yelled Thore’s grandfather who ran to help his wife.

“Thore, come with me,” said his grandmother as she took the young boy into the next room but before turning down the hall, Thore turned to face his mother and looked her into the eyes.  Then all of a sudden, Thore’s mom became like a zombie.  She turned around and left the house, vowing to never return.  Thore grandfather gave him a look.

“You did that, didn’t you?” he said with a grave look on his face. 

“Thore, you know we don’t like it when you do that,” said his grandmother and then Thore walked to his room by himself with a smile across his face. 

United States of America, 2018

            A young girl name Eliza Doe was in her room doing college algebra when she heard her foster mother talking quickly into her phone.  Eliza closed her college textbook and walked into the living room where her foster mother quickly hung up the phone. 

“Eliza darling, come here,” she said but Eliza did not move. 

“Eliza, your caseworker, Mr. Walter will be here tomorrow to see you.  He wants to see how you are doing,” she lied.  Eliza shook her head and her foster mother looked away form her gaze but then looked back. 

            Eliza’s foster mother got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen where she picked up a knife and started to stab herself.  Eventually she fell on the ground in a pool of her own blood and Eliza looked out the window, cross her arms, and smiled at the world outside. 

United Nations, 2020 - 2022

            Dr. Allen Road went before all the representatives of the United Nations in New York during the summer of the year 2020.  He was in charge of a new study program called the Nation Project and he proposed that his program go to every country and give the same exact test to everyone between the ages of five and ten to see who has the best scores and how different the thinking process is between the age difference in the children.  The United Nations passed his proposed and starting in two years in the month of May, children across the world will be given a new and improve IQ test along with the other tests. 

            During the month of June in 2022, Dr. Road and his program received all the scores from every country in the world.  Dr. Road was disappointed by discovering that the best schools were in Asia but it was due to their education system on how they pressure their children, have classes on Saturdays, and teach students to never ask questions.  He found that the worst schools were The United States along with Canada due to their version of education in which they express creative thinking.  But when Dr. Allan checked the exams for creativity, Canada and the US scored the highest and the lowest were the Asian schools.  Creativity vs Non- creativity.  Although you need math and such materials to succeed in life, you also need creativity to stand out from your competition.  However, these results have been known since the early 2000’s, so the results were nothing new. 

When Dr. Road went to look at the IQ test, he was disappointed to find that his findings were inconclusive.  Dr. Road was looking ahead and showing the United Nations his findings: nothing.  Just facts that people already know and he cannot determine which country has the worst and best education due to different ways of looking at the results. 

“Dr. Road,” said a voice at the door.  The door open to reveal one of the staff members helping Dr. Road on his research. 

“Yes?”

“I have some information that may be interesting for you,” While she said this, Dr. Road was thinking that she would show something she found, while Dr. Road would show her the loop whole that she did not see, which would bring him back to his depression state. 

“Tell me,” he said.

“Well, I looked at the IQ exams and due to the numbers, they were inconclusive,”

“I know,”

“However, there are many students with learning disabilities and ADHD including those who have never been discovered.  For those children, they were given both the regular IQ exam and a special IQ exam to meet their needs of disability,”

“I know,”

“Well, we discovered that some children with the learning disabilities scored a perfect score on their IQ exams,”

“It may be a fluke, re-test them,”

“We did.  Five times,” Dr. Road was silent and thinking.  Children who scored a 200 on an IQ exam but due to their disability, their intelligence would had been over look by many.  But only very few have ever scored a perfect score on an IQ exam.  But here, they found more than one.  What were the possibilities of finding not one, but more then one child, a genius who was over looked by everyone? 

“Do you have their files?”

“Yes sir.  I have four files here,” Dr. Road looked at the files to see that to his surprise, the four children were from completely different countries.  Not only that, looking through their files, he also discovered that they had the same exact birthdays.

“I will meet these children in person and give them one final test,”

            After flying to South Africa, Germany, and China, Dr. Road went back to the United States in September of 2022, to a small town not far from New York in New Jersey.  He walked to the local elementary public school to meet a young ten-year-old girl name Eliza Doe. 

            Eliza was sitting at a desk in a classroom that was empty.  In the room was the principal waiting for Dr. Road and Eliza’s homeroom teacher. 

“Hello Eliza.  I have a small gift for you,” and Dr. Road handed her a box that if done right, could be open.  It was one huge giant puzzle.  The puzzle would leave most stress and disappointed and those who could finish it, took hours.  However, Eliza took three minutes without effort. 

“Thank you Eliza, you may leave,”

“Principal Yegger, may have Eliza’s parent’s contact information?”

“Dr. Road, Eliza is an orphan.  She is living with her foster family,”

            Dr. Road stood in front of a house that need repair and quickly.  He was amazed that social service would allow a child to live here with her foster family.  Dr. Road slightly trip up the stairs due to the steps breaking and not even.  When he got to the door he discovered that the bell didn’t work, so he knocked.  A man, who smelled and was wearing clothes that look like had never been washed opened the door.

“Yeah?”

“I wish to talk to Eliza Doe’s guardians,”

“What is it this time?  Whatever it is, I’m not responsible.  Social Services is coming for her at the end of the week, then she’ll be gone, okay?”

“No, it’s not that.  It’s just that Eliza is a gifted girl.  I was hoping I could ask you questions about her biological parents,”

“You’ll need to talk to her case worker about that.  She’ll be here Saturday at seven,”

            Dr. Road sat down in the office of Eliza’s case manger while Eliza sat out in the hallway, waiting to see where she would be place next. 

“I am Dr. Road from the United Nations.  We did a series of tests on elementary school children all across the world.  It’s hard to believe, but Eliza did extremely well, too well actually,”

“What do you want?”

“I wish to know about her biological parents.  I have a form here from the United States government that says you must give me her files,” The case worker look at the documents and then open her drawer to find Eliza’s folder and handed it over to Dr. Road for him to read.

“Eliza’s mother died when she was three.  She hung herself.  Her mother had no other family so Eliza was quickly placed in a foster home,”

“Her father?”

“No father.  Her mother was ill.  Claimed that there was no father, that Eliza was a virgin birth.  After the child was born, her mother became deeply depressed and shut herself in her apartment.  When we found Eliza she was malnourish and underweight for her age.  We were not sure if she would survive a year due to her living conditions,”

“How is she in school?”

“Shortly after starting school she was discovered to have a learning disability.  She was placed in special classes where she excelled.  However, she excels in math and science.  Her prize possessions are college level textbooks.  Although we know she is very smart, it seems she wishes to hide this from her teachers,”

“How is she with other children?”

“Terrible.  Everyone is afraid of her.  Accidents happen around her,”

“What do you mean?”

“Deaths.  Sometimes the foster parent dies or another child dies in her presences.  I’ve had to place her in over ten different foster homes, orphanages, and group homes.  Everyone eventually becomes afraid of her,”

“I can tell you are afraid of her too,”

“Dr. Road, what do you want with Eliza,”

“I want to take her to the United Nation where she will meet three other children like her.  Again, I have the documents from the government that gives me permission.  For a limit time, she will be the foster daughter of the US representative at the United Nations, however she will mostly be with me during the studies,” The case worker looked through the documents until she agreed and allowed Eliza to go with Dr. Road. 

November – December 2022

            Dr. Road kept himself close to the children.  He discovered amazing things about the children, separately.  He noticed that if he showed or shared information with one child, the other children knew immediately.  All four children were “virgin” births, had terrible past experiences with death, at least one learning disability, telepathy which made people fear them, and each one was unique in one area of art. 

            For Joseph, the boy from South Africa, he was gifted with music.  When he is given a simple object such as a piece of wood, a chair, a table, a broom, he is able to turn it into an instrument and create a sound that can be compared to Mozart. 

            Xiao Fei, the girl from China, was gifted with sports.  She was able to watch someone do a trick and without anyone teaching her she was able to do it exactly as it was shown, no matter what sport it was.  She was also a fast runner and swimmer.  In the UN pool she was able to break records that could only be broken by professionals.  In China she was taken away from home to be trained for the Olympics but due to fear, she was sent back home. 

            Thore, the boy from Germany, was gifted in coloring and painting.  He could make an exact replica of famous paintings such as Starry Night or the Mona Lisa, without a single mistake.  His own paintings were extraordinary and were way beyond his years.  No one would believe that his paintings and coloring were done by a mere ten-year-old boy who was never given a single art lesson. 

            Eliza, the girl from the United States, was gifted in mathematics and science.  She was able to make her own equations and solve difficult problems for college students.  Her only resources were books she found in libraries and local bookstores.  She admitted to stealing books so that she could learn.  She was also able to write her equations and problems in code so that she (and probably the other children) was the only ones who could interpret it. 

            It was November and Dr. Road never introduced the children to each other.  All four of them were always looked after by their embassies.  Dr. Road could tell that each representative at the UN was proud of his or her prodigy.  But something did not seem right to Dr. Road. 

            December 4^th was the children’s birthday.  The four embassies came together to through separate parties for each child.  However, when the party was about to begin, all four children disappeared.  Everyone went crazy and looked all over the place for the children.  After helping the search party, Dr. Road went to his apartment to relax and try to think where the children would go.  When he fell asleep he saw a picture in his head.  The picture was of an abandon building near the Hudson River.  Dr. Road suddenly woke up, grabbed his jacket, and immediately took off for that location.

            When he arrived at the location, he followed his dream to an abandon building and walked in.  In the building he saw all four children, standing there, as if waiting for him. 

“Children, everyone is looking for you, you need to return to your embassies,”

“We will not be separated,” said Eliza. 

“We wish to be alone,” they all said together. 

“Your only children, you can’t live here on your own,”

“Get out or we will make you,” said Thore.  Dr. Road became frighten and felt fear for the first time in the presences of the children.  He decided to leave, planning that he would find a way to return them to their embassies and his research. 

            When the embassies discovered where the children were, they became very upset.  Dr. Road was ready to give up his research and allow the children to stay together.  He was wondering if he could make a deal with them or find a suitable place for them to stay together, but somehow he knew it was pointless.  The children would not change their minds. 

            One night, the Chinese embassy hired a group of men to kidnap the children and take them to the Chinese embassy, alive.  When the group of men went passed the “no trespassing” all four children immediately woke up from their sleep and prepared themselves for their guests. 

            When the kidnappers entered the building, they held up their guns and went looking for the children. 

“Come out kids.  We don’t want to hurt you.  We need you alive!” they yelled in Chinese.  Then one of them spotted Eliza and they charged after her with their guns up.  Eliza ran and was trapped in a corner.

“We’ve got you know, girl” they said but when they turned around they found the other three children standing behind them. 

“Shoot the girl.  If we lose one, it is okay.  Three is better then none,” said one of the kidnappers.  This sparked fear in the children and the children made the men shoot one another until they all died. 

            After the kidnaper’s deaths, the children came together and talk to each other through telepathy and they came to an agreement. 

January 2023

            Dr. Road had a dream of the Central Park Zoo and he knew what the dream meant.  The children wanted to meet him at the zoo.  When Dr. Road arrived at the zoo, he discovered it to be empty except for four children standing at the sea lion exhibit. 

“Dr. Road,” Eliza said.

“Children,”

“I know you are thinking about those men.  The ones who died,” said Eliza.

“They should have not been there but there are other ways to save yourself instead of killing people.  Killing is wrong,”

“They were going to kill me,”

“You could have done something different.  Killing only leads to killing,” There was a silence between them for a moment until Eliza responded.

“We agreed.  Because you seem to be the only one who cares about us, we will share with you who we really are,”

“I’m confused,”

“We are decedents of four important apostles of Jesus.  I am the descended of Matthew.  Joseph is the of descended of Mark.  Xiao Fei is the of descended of Luke.  And Thore is the of descended of John,”

“What are you?  Why are you here?”

“We are human, but also not human.  You can say we are in between that of a human and of an angel.  We were sent here to test the human race, to see if you were ready for a savior.  That is why we needed to be together because we had to come to a decision.  But after the killing, we had to come to deal with a difficult reality.  We know why we are here and we must make a decision that will change the world forever,” Then all four children held on to each other’s hands and Dr. Road noticed the look of desperation on their faces.  Then at the exact same time, they fell and Dr. Road saw an orange bottle leave from one of their pockets. 

            Dr. Road went to check on the children but he knew it was already too late.  He should have been wondering what decision the children came to.  If the world was ready for a savior or not.  But he was not thinking that, instead he took all four children into his arms and held them.  They came to this world like any other children, but they were unlucky to face the cruelty of the world at a very young age.  The children should had lived normal lives with normal families and grow up to be doctors, lawyers, teachers, pilots, or any other profession but instead they knew their destiny from the very beginning. 

            Dr. Road could only weep for the children who were unfortunate to not have the luxury to live as normal children which all children should be given, weather they are human or not. 

           

Left

This short story is dedicated to the four children abandoned in Sugamo.

            I woke up to Danny crying and I crawled over to the couch, where he was sleeping.

“You just turned five, your getting too old for this,” I told him quietly. 

“I’m hungry,” he said through his tears.

“I know you are, we all are,”

“Food.  I want food,”

“I’ll get food but you’ll have to wait until tonight,” I waited until he went back to sleep and that was when I got up for the day.  I switch the light switch even though I knew nothing would happen but I still had hope that we would have electricity.  Then I walked into the bathroom and turned the sink on.  No water that was not another surprise.  I walked over to the pile of dirty clothes and started to sort out the clothes that belong to me.  I smelled each shirt, trying to find one that did not smell.  When I thought I found the right one, I took off my white t-shirt and put on the new shirt. 

“Joseph,” I heard my sister say and I walked into the living room to find her sitting up. 

“Go back to sleep, I’ll get food for us tonight,” I told her.

“It’s not about food.  Just that, before the sun sets, I would like to cut your hair, it’s getting too long,” and I nodded to her.  I pile our clothes into a bag and walked out of the apartment but I made sure that no one was in the hallway before leaving because we still did not pay rent or any of the bills.  Once down stairs, I got on my bike and I to 7-11 that was located down the street from us. 

            When I walked in there was only one guy working.  He’s seen me before looking around the place and sometimes buying something, but today I had no money and I only wanted soap to clean our clothes.  When he was not looking, I took a bar soap and hid it in my underwear.  I walked out and my heart was pounding because I thought he would come out and chase me but instead, none of that happened.  I knew it was only bar soap, but it would have to do. 

            At the river near the Church I dumped all the clothes out and started a wash.  I looked at the Church every few minutes to make sure no one was looking.  It was a weekday and I knew most of the children my age were in school and that no one would be at mass since it was not a Sunday.  But I cleaned the clothes as quickly as possible and when I was done, I put them all back in the bag and rushed home. 

            “The clothes need to dry,” I said when I walked into the apartment.  My sister and Danny were still sleeping.  When my sister heard me she got up and helped me put the clothes outside to dry. 

“You should rest,” my sister said to me and I took her advice.  I got on the floor and crawled under the blanket using one of the couch pillows as my pillow.  And once I closed my eyes I started to dream about our mother. 

            We moved into town about a year ago but mom wanted to keep it a secret that she had three children.  But ever since I was ten, she knew that she needed my help with my younger siblings so since then, she’s been telling people that she had only one child.  It’s been four years since then and I still keep my siblings a secret from everyone. 

“If I tell a landowner that I have three kids, then we would not have a home.  Simple as that,” she told me when she took me out to dinner once. 

            One night in September mother told us that she had to go away for a while on a business trip but would be back in a week.  That week turned into a month and whenever she went to work she would come home late and sometimes she would come home the next morning, usually drunk. 

            Mother never wanted Danny or my sister to go outside out of fear that someone might see them and know that she was lying.  Because of that, my siblings and I were home schooled but we were not on any list or anything.  Mother went out to a bookstore and bought us books to help us learn.  However we are very much behind everyone. 

            Danny is now five but he can’t spell or do simple math.  Because he cannot spell, he can not read or write.  My sister has being teaching him the alphabet but he gets all the letters mix up and he finds math difficult.  My sister has told my mother that he probably has a learning disability but mother does not believe in any of that and does not believe in education.  She dropped out of high school and has enough money to raise three children, or at least that is what she told us. 

            In December that following year, mother told us that she had to go across the country for work and that she would be gone for a month.  She left me a phone number and told me that she would be sending money to us for rent and bills.  A month passed, then two, then three, until today, the first day of June or at least I thought it was the first day of June.  Mother has not sent us money since March and we ran out months ago.  One day I decided to give her a call, however, the phone company told us that the phone number did not exists. 

            I woke up to a knock on the door and I saw that my sister was already up checking on the clothes to make sure they were clean. 

“Ms. Webler, I’ve come for the rent.  You have not paid me yet.  Are you there?  Is anyone there,” and we all stayed silent.  I looked at my sister and she looked at me.  We both kept silent and at that moment I was so happy that Danny never snored or talked in his sleep.  Eventually we started to hear the foot steps walk down the hallway. 

“We need to take care of the rent or they will find us,” my sister said and I knew she was right.  I had to get money some way even though I was underage for most places that was hiring. 

“I’ll go out,” I said and without changing, left the apartment and went into town.  I saw a lot of “Now Hiring” signs but when I told people I was sixteen they asked for ID and I had to leave.  If I needed an ID then I knew I would never get work. 

Instead of getting work, I grabbed an empty cup on the side of the street and rode a few towns over and started to beg.  I hated begging, but if it would give us some money, then it was worth it.  I felt stupid asking money because most people gave me a sad or curious look and walk past me.  Very few people gave me money and if they did, it was usually some sort of coin.  As I was walking in a town I noticed that a policeman took a notice into me and I quickly hid the cup and took a turn at the corner and ran into an ally.  I hid behind a few garbage cans and watched as the police started to run down the street I just turned on to.  When I knew it was okay to leave, I took the long way back to my bike. 

When I got back to my town it was a little passed three and I was watching school children walking home from school.  I sat on a bench and watch the children pass by.  There were children of all ages, younger, older, or my age.  They had clean clothes, smelled clean, shiny hair that was probably recently cut, and had backpacks filled with books. 

“I hate school!” I heard one boy say as he walk pass me, talking to another boy he was with.  I gave him a look but he did not notice. 

“You should feel lucky,” I quietly said to no one.  When I thought most of the school kids walked pass me I got back on my bike and went home.  

            At the apartment, my sister was trying to get Danny to learn his alphabet but he was struggling and about to have a tantrum.  When Danny saw me he gave me a smile that quickly went away. 

“No food?” he asked.

“Not yet, but later today we will have food,”

“Did you get a job?” asked my sister.

“They want me to have some sort of ID.  It’ll never happen.  We’ll have to wait for mom to send us money,” My sister then gave me a look that said “it would never happen” but she kept quiet for Danny’s sake.

“When is mommy coming home?” he asked and I gave him a huge smile and patted him on the head.

“Soon,” I told him and he returned my answer with a huge smile.

“When mommy comes home I’ll make her a huge present that will put a big smile on her face and maybe if I say ‘I miss you mommy’ she’ll stay,”

“If you tell her that, I bet she will definitely stay,” I told him and he jump up and down clapping.  My sister and I had to remind him to stay quiet so the neighbors would not hear. 

“You guys want to go to the park?” I asked them.

“Really!  You mean ‘outside’?  Can we?” asked Danny and my sister gave me an approval look. 

            The three of us snuck out and we walked all the way to the park that was two blocks away and surrounded by woods.  There was a playground for Danny to go down slides and swings for my sister to swing on and a jungle jim where I got to climb.  There were other people there, but they ignored us as three kids who were stuck in school that wanted to get out and have fun. 

“Brother!  Can you swing us around on the tire swing?” Danny asked grabbing our sister and taking her to the tire swing.  They both got on and I put a big smile on my face as I pushed them on the swing.  The two of them laughed and I laughed with them because we rarely had moments where all three of us laughed together and enjoy life as children. 

            When the sun started to set, I noticed that most parents were taking their children home.  My sister and I agreed that it was time to go home and I escorted them back to the apartment.  Once they were inside I took my bike and went into town to a small Deli where a guy named Liam worked at. 

            I walked inside and found Liam behind the register, as always.  There was no one else in the store. 

“Three bags,” I told Liam and he handed the over.  In each bag were small bags of chips, cookies, brownies, and other junk food.  Then he handed me a huge gallon of water. 

“Thank you,” I said to Liam. 

            Liam graduated from high school a year ago but had no money for college since he was a foster kid.  He moved from house to house and once he was eighteen, he left, got his own place and a job.  When he caught me begging in January he knew I was alone with no parent.  He said he would protect me from the foster system by providing me with food, sometimes money if he could spare it.  He told me that my siblings and I were better off in our home then in the system.  Liam was in the system since he was four and he was the youngest of five.  They split them up and Liam rarely saw his siblings and when he did see them, they felt more like distant cousins then siblings.  The majority of his older siblings ran away from their foster homes and became street punks, hook on drugs and stuff, but Liam did not want that.  He said he was mostly upset that none of them tried to get him out of the system, he was always alone. 

            As I was riding home from getting the food I always thought about Liam’s life in the foster system.  I would never allow that for my sister and Danny.  Even if we were put into the system, I would get them out once I turned eighteen, I would never leave them. 

            “Danny I have food!” I said once I opened the door but instead of Danny running up to me and giving me a big hug for getting food, I heard my sister crying. 

“Rachel, what’s wrong?” I asked as I put down the grocery bags and walked into the living room.  That was when I saw Rachel crying and Danny on the floor. 

“Danny, get up,” I said and I sat down next to him and pushed him a little.

“Get up,” I said softly but he did not move.  

“Danny,” I said and then tears started to go down my face. 

“He was just sitting trying to do his ABC’s and it was hot so he opened one of the windows.  A bee came in and stung him.  He never got stung before so I never knew,” and then I held my sister in my arms and we both cried together, silently, so that the neighbors could not hear. 

            My sister and I found Danny’s favorite clothes.  Jean shorts, Power Ranger’s underwear, a white T-shirt with Marvel Heroes on it, and plain white sockets.  He loved his Pokemon sneakers, but they no longer fit on his feet so we decided that we would bury them next to the body.  Rachel got to cut his hair and I gathered his favorite toys.  His teddy bear that he got as an infant, ABC’s and math book, and a picture of him with mom a year ago.  We placed the body on his favorite blanket and put the objects on his body, and then we wrapped it all together.  My sister was still very upset about his death, she would not stop crying. 

“I’ll take him to the Church.  It will be easier with just one of us instead of both,” and Rachel agreed but before taking the body she kissed him and said good-bye. 

            It was around two in the morning and everyone was asleep.  It was easy getting to the rill by the Church and crossing it to the woods on the other side.  I had a toy shovel and I started to dig.  I was so deep into the woods that I did not care that I cried or that I was there until sunrise.  Before I placed the body down I kissed it and said a little prayer for Danny.  I hoped that wherever he went, he was happy and getting a lot of food and love.  Then I cover the dirt and left the site wiping tears with my shirt. 

            When I got back, Rachel was sleeping but her eyes were red.  When I saw that the couch was empty I started to cry.  Danny was gone.  The boy who always saw the good things and put a smile on to make people happy was gone.  I wanted my little brother back, but I knew that was not going to happen and I crawled under my blanket and fell asleep with tears in my eyes. 

            I got up around noon and walked around the apartment like a zombie.  I felt nothing.  I still could not believe that my brother was gone.  I decided to go out and I walked out without telling Rachel (who was still sleeping) and without changing clothes.  I was amaze to see that we had mail in the lobby.  I took the letter and walked back upstairs to open it. 

            In the letter was over 5,000 dollars.  I knew right away that it was from mom but that was the only thing in it.  There was no letter but there was a return address from Texas but I knew that by the time a letter would get there she would be gone or that she was using a fake address.  I put the envelope down and sat down next to Rachel who was still sleeping.  That was when I heard the knock.

“Social Services, I’m looking for Ms. Webler.  If you do not open up I will need to call the police.  Open up, please,” I did not move and Rachel did not wake up, she was definitely tired.  I looked around the room and saw how dirty the apartment was, filthy clothes everywhere, no electricity, no running water, dead plants, pots filled the sink, the bathroom stunk of urine and feces, the whole apartment was like a giant garbage.  That was when I gave up.

I walked to the door and open it slightly to look at the social worker.  He was bald with just a small piece of hair on his chin. 

“Hello there, I am Mr. Mandel from Social Services.  I’m looking for Ms. Webler, I’m guessing she is your mother,”

“She’s not here,”

“Oh, well may I come in,” and I shrugged and let him in.  He was in shock when he saw how filthy our apartment was and I saw him put a tissue up to his nose.  Rachel started to get up and when she saw the social worker, she ignored him.  I could tell that she gave up too. 

“Where is Ms. Webler?” he asked.

“I don’t know.  She’s away on business,” I said.

“Where?”

“I don’t know,”

“How long has she been gone?”

“Since early December,”

“Oh my God,” he said and I saw the shock on his face.  Then he looked at the piece of paper in his hand.

“According to the landowner, she has one child,”

“No, she had three,”

“Three?  Well, where is the third?”

“Gone,”

“Gone where?” he asked and I looked at the shovel that was next to the door and the social worker look towards where I was gazing and then back at me.  Rachel and I showed almost no emotion and just stared at him like children who did not know what to do. 

“Oh my God,” he said again.